Sunday, July 12, 2009

Afternoon with a Tibetan Buddhist Monk



I'm thinking in this photo the venerable Konchok Tharchin should probably be doing a "thumbs up"; he is an utterly cool guy. Calm and peaceful with a smile that echoes down to the bottoms of his burgundy socks.

About Ven. Konchok Tharchin.

He's 29 years old, an ordained monk from the Drikung Kagyu lineage of Tibetan Buddhism. He is a Sankrit scholar and expert on Buddhist sutras and texts. He received some of his education in Boston, learning by day and working as a paramedic at night. He teaches on Buddhist topics throughout Florida and is on call in Tampa area hospitals when dying patients request a Buddhist monk.

(Allow me to digress and explain my accidental path to Buddhism. If you don't care, please scroll to skip everything in italics.

Inhaling deeply to describe a 34 year spiritual path without periods or semicolons - was raised Jehovah's Witness since I was 2, married an elder, had an epiphany on the operating table when the doctor who was performing the C-section said "she has rH negative blood" (JWs won't accept blood transfusions for themselves or their children), left my husband, took my son and bailed out of the religion, went atheist for about 6 months while the holocaust series was big on TV (mid 70s), realized I had accidentally confused God with religion, started praying again, started reading Wayne Dyer (as other recovering JWs went through therapy), realized Dyer was Deepak Choprah lite, read Choprah, realized he was the Hindu scriptures and Upanishads lite, was reading the Upanishads when I encountered a Korean Buddhist monk at the Shot show in Vegas. (I won't waste your time by telling you how I wound up at the Shot Show.)

That wonderful experience in the weirdest of places was transformative. I had an opportunity to spend four or five days with a monk and an elderly woman who lived on-site at the temple. Again, that's a whole 'nother story.

So after meeting them, in time, solidly on this more direct path, I bought "Awakening the Buddha Within" by Lama Surya Das. I pounded it into my brain. I bought the tapes and listened every time I got in my car.

The tapes are toast but the book is still my Bible. I have given away many copies.

So I moved to South Fort Myers and have been blessed to find what I did NOT expect to find here; a spiritual community, a "sangha". One day after yoga at Health and Harmony on McGregor in Fort Myers I nearly walked into the Tibetan monk who had arrived to conduct class in our yoga room.

That was like someone offering to give me a handful of diamonds. Of course I stayed.

That was the class where the monk boiled Buddhism down into three basic points. (I will probably get some of this wrong, I have writer's brain - I change words when I really don't mean to):

1 - Be generous/compassionate

2 - Do no harm

3 - Tame the mind

I was able to talk to the monk after that first session and found out he has local contacts. I asked the owner of Health & Harmony to bring him back; she thought he lived too far away. When I told her he is often nearby, she arranged to have him come back. So I was looking forward to this for a long time.

I thought the class would be about an hour. It was to be three hours. I had done yoga in the same room and 3 more hours of floor time ... went amazingly fast.

The attendees at these things are always fascinating. Some dress like gypsies or fortune tellers, they have their wrists covered in mala beads. One had an elegant pashmina shawl. If they could, they might have brought sherpas. I always wonder what goes on in monk minds when they see American women act out this way. I wonder if they laugh a little.

We weirdos always sit in the front row on cushions and blankets.

Less demonstrative folk sit in chairs near the walls. One woman sat in a chair and I noticed she had a problem with her feet - they didn't reach the floor. I got her a bolster so she could sit comfortably.

The Ven. Konchok Tharchin was about 15 minutes late. That was hilarious. Nobody cared. There is no more gentle, upbeat audience than a bunch of people interested in Buddhism.

He seated himself on a layering of about three cushions - one square, one round ... then I lost track. He was in heavy burgundy robes with a deep magenta tee underneath:-) I imagined him in TJ Maxx thinking "this is as close to burgundy as it gets."

Once he had himself in place he said something like "Here in the United States punctuality is very important." We all laughed. He would bring that up throughout.

This class was "Four Thoughts that Turn the Mind to Enlightenment." My description of the thoughts is accurate, but I sum up what he said in my own way; I hope I'm true to his intention.

THE FIRST THOUGHT THAT TURNS THE MIND: the good fortune of obtaining a precious human birth.

No other living/breathing creature lives as many years as we do. We never stop to think about and appreciate that fact.

Note that all in attendance were so quiet you could hear a tummy gurgle. Unfortunately, it was mine, I hadn't had time to eat. An older woman came in the door, said "I'm here" and waved. She sat against the wall next to the woman who needed a bolster for her feet. Within moments her phone rang and rang and rang as she desperately tried to find it in an enormous bag. People who move here love steel drum ringtones.

The monk never skipped a beat.

Shortly after shutting off her phone the woman dozed off and started snoring gently. I shared a smile with the woman to her right.

THE SECOND THOUGHT THAT TURNS THE MIND: the universality of impermanence.

We all die. We need to be grateful for our years and use them wisely.

He has attended many deaths - both as a monk and as a paramedic. He has also met with people who have been told they don't have long to live. In many cases there is a joy to it because it is the first time they truly APPRECIATE the moments/hours/days.

The woman who had dozed off raised her hand and said when her father died she saw a pillar (?) of white light. I can't remember the exact word she used.

The monk's face lit up. "Clear light" he said. He talked about that phenomena, how it can occur when a wise person passes and a wise person is there to see it. Something like that ...

I want to look it up, I've never heard of it.

THE THIRD THOUGHT THAT TURNS THE MIND: Karma - cause and effect.

He gave a powerful example that was pretty upsetting. He has a friend who was a big game hunter, I didn't think I'd be able to write about it but I think I need to share it.

One day his friend shot a large deer. The animal crawled TO him as if to say "why did you kill me?"

And the deer had a fawn.

This is not legend, this is not Disney, this is someone the monk knows personally.

The monk said we need to consider these four things when we reflect upon our actions.

What was your:

1 - Intention
2 - Action
3 - Result
4 - State of mind after the action

In this case:

Intention - his friend wanted another head to hang on the wall.
Action - he took aim and pulled the trigger.
Result - he killed a sentient being.
State of mind - remorse.

This monk adds a fifth consideration; what did you do with the experience?

His friend changed, he took full responsibility for what he had done and stopped killing. He raised the fawn, which the monk says is "an old deer now:-)"

Note that this whole experience would have been much different if the original intention had been to acquire food for his family.

THE FOURTH THOUGHT THAT TURNS THE MIND: The nature of samsara - cyclic existence.

We live, we die, we are born again.

Some Buddhists theorize that babies cry because it's like "oh no, not again!" As they grow they fall into step with the new life, accepting the pleasures and the pains.

He said science has shown there is no reason why people sleep. In Buddhism, it is said "we sleep so we can know how to die."

He talked about how the state of our mind at death affects our next lifetime. If we pass in an angry state, we are reborn to an angry state.

If we are clinging to things we may become "ghosts" who "search for what they cannot find." (About attachment "Don't get attached; it is not what you get attached to, but the attachment itself" that brings pain.)

If we die in a peaceful place, we are reborn to a peaceful place.

He talked about a woman in India who was robbed and stabbed in her rural home; when they found her, a blood trail showed she had crawled to her home altar to die.

Buddhists believe a type of awareness stays with the bodies from several hours to about 49 days after death.

HE TOLD US HOW TO DIE.

He said "if you die quickly, please try to remember this. Release anger and sadness; apologize."

I LOVE THIS: There is no concept of heaven in Buddhism because "it does not serve others".

"When we die, two things follow; consciousness and karma."

Most do not remember past lives.

IF YOU HAVE DONE GOOD DEEDS THIS DAY YOU CAN SPREAD YOUR GOOD KARMA AROUND.

Share it with others through a merit dedication prayer.

Thank you Ven. Konchok Tharchin for sharing these teachings.

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