Sunday, October 11, 2009

BORROWED MAGIC


Life sucks for most everyone right now. Time to reflect inward ... I'm working on my story, one chapter at a time. It's the tale of a little bastard who is raised Jehovah's Witness by her mother, grandmother and great-grandmother. This is the version I'll be reading at my writers meetup group Tuesday night. It's all true and the names and places are real.


BORROWED MAGIC

We were born in 1950, a few months and five houses apart.

Karen Spurgeon lived at one end of Wellington; St. Leonard’s Catholic Church and convent were at the other. After all the whispered rumors of pregnant nuns and buried babies, the place creeped me out.

The Spurgeon children went to school there.

Karen was the oldest of five rambunctious kids. She had orange curly hair, big round freckles and a great sense of adventure. Next in age was Little Stevie, stick thin and only moderately vexing. We let him play with us … sometimes.

Back then children didn’t knock or ring doorbells - we called each other out in extended syllables. When Karen came to my grandmother’s little white house, she envied my quiet and privacy. When I went to her house, I envied the noise, fish stick Fridays and brownies that came out of boxes.

Food became a big part of our relationship and we grew out as much as up. Her youngest sister Theresa the Climber had chronic sinus problems. To my horror, “Micki” always sounded like “Piggy”.

Karen’s mother Janet didn’t eat - she smoked. She looked like the Marlboro Man - tough and wiry without T or A. Karen’s father Jim was large man with five o-clock shadow. I was afraid of him because I’d heard he drank real blood while studying for the priesthood.

The whole concept of fathers was sort of lost on me anyway. Mine left when I was seven and never came back. I didn’t have holidays either. I remember sitting in the living room with the lights out as groups of costumed children laughed their way past my house on Halloween.

Karen always shared her take with me.

Each winter her father spent hours building the perfect rink in the back yard. He laid the hose and nozzle within the branches of a leafless tree, directing a fine mist that created ice as smooth as glass.

Skating on that perfect rink was pure magic.

Her family had the great sparkling Christmases you see in movies. They even had TV. Watching Disney and the Jetsons was something special. If it was late when I left, Karen walked me halfway home. That was a big deal, even though there was less to fear back then. We’d walk exactly 2 ½ houses and run the rest of the way alone in the darkness.

As we entered our teens, my religion closed in as Karen broke loose. Her parochial plaid skirts got shorter as her hair got bigger. The last time we talked as kids she was walking home from school with an armful of books. A June bug flew to certain death in her rat’s nest and she shook her head violently in an attempt to dislodge the buzzing insect.

That day the nuns had dragged her to the john to wash her face and brush her hair. She hated school.

I never saw her again. Well, for 30 years, anyway. That’s when I saw the obituary. Janet was dead.

By then my Gram was growing old alone in her little white house and I was visiting every week. The funeral would take place at St. Leonard’s.

I told Gram we should go. She agreed.

We walked from the sunshine of the parking lot into the darkness of a chapel lit only by candles. The Spurgeons had attended that church all of their lives, so I expected the pews would be full; they weren’t.

As we walked down the aisle to Janet's coffin, a tall thin man with a beard walked up with shocking enthusiasm. He called me by name. Little Stevie remembered my Gram too. "Hello Ethel!!"

He walked us up to the coffin and softly explained that his mother had died of lung cancer. My Gram said that was a shame and he said "it’s ok - she's in a better place."

Gram blurted out "what do you mean 'in a better place' - SHE'S DEAD!"

I was mortified. It always amazes me when people who have been religious all their lives become fearful towards the end.

I don’t remember much about the actual service except for the darkness and the sudden problem I had with my vision. There was a full spectrum of color around each of the candles. I blinked hard and rubbed, but the colors remained.

After the service, Karen and Stevie invited me to the wake. I dropped Gram off and drove out. We spent hours catching up. Karen was an RN, Stevie was passionate about doing civil war reenactments.

They told me their mother had smoked all her life and only managed to quit one month before her death. We all agreed she might as well have kept on smoking.

They said “well, at least our parents are together now.”

Karen explained that her father had died some years earlier. She said his spirituality had intensified with age and he saw death as "the next great adventure."

He promised when he got to the other side, he would send rainbows.

That was the last time I saw Karen and Stevie. But the memory of the rainbows will last as long as I live.

Maybe longer.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Connie Mack's Town Hall Fiasco in Fort Myers


I've said it before. I was afraid to move down here because I knew I wouldn't mix well with the Bible thumpers.

I'm not talking about the genuinely pious people who are kind, giving, salt of the earth folk who quietly live their faith. I admire them.

I'm talking about the freaks who use religion as an excuse to judge, belittle and hammer others.

I faced my demons on Friday. Literally. I picketed for the first time in my life. We were ridiculed by a small cluster of old white guys with nice pensions, loose dentures and belts under their armpits.

Funny ... outside their side looked like Grumpy Old Men and ours looked like Calendar Girls. (The younger people were still at work and school - they joined us later. Still, we had them way outnumbered outside. Inside, we were about 100 in all, but we seemed like more.)

Outside was pleasant compared to the tension inside. Friends will be amazed to know I endured six stressful hours without flipping anyone off or dropping f-bombs.

I was not familiar with Connie Mack. What a smarmy talking head. We made him nervous; he stumbled over much of his intro. His theme was "The Democrats' Health Care Bill is a Prescription for Disaster."

When his comments were unbearable, I DID blurt out BULLSHIT ... loud enough for three rows to hear, but not loud enough to get myself removed.

The southern gentleman (whose right hip was pressed against my left hip) shifted uncomfortably in his chair when he realized he was not sitting with his own kind. We muttered shots at each other backways over our shoulders through the whole damned thing.

It was like being married.

Here's the article; I'm the last quote in Liz Freeman's article, which I consider quite a compliment.

http://www.naplesnews.com/news/2009/oct/02/mack-health-care-town-hall-fort-myers/

Here's what I posted to comments. (If you're in a hurry, scroll right down to the confession I have highlighted in red. It just blew me away, you need to read it.)

"If I were Catholic I'd be heading to confession for the amount of RAGE I felt last night. I was seated next to a family of affluent self-righteous Republicans who were talking about people in need as if they were subhuman sewer dwellers.

HEAR ME. There are not just two levels of society in this country - "Haves" and "Have-nots" - there are THREE. Let's talk about the HADS for a minute. We HAD jobs, we HAD health insurance. We didn't BUY investment properties when all you needed to get a mortgage was a pulse. We AREN'T extravagant. We didn't EARN the crisis we're in today. (Don't even pretend Obama did not INHERIT this mess from "The Decider".)

Every time Mack mentioned "health savings accounts" my stomach turned. Who among us could afford a savings account? We can barely afford food!

The insurance companies were getting wealthier as Mack stood there using all those pretty words that said ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.

When Karen Ramdeen spoke I wanted to stand up and applaud!!! She had something real to say! She is sick, she is my age, she doesn't know where to turn. What did they do? They said THERE ARE SOLUTIONS - SEE US AFTER THE EVENT.

If there are solutions for her, where are the solutions for the rest of us? Where is that information? Where are those clinics? I have nowhere to turn EITHER.

Are some of you people aware that there are some of us who face life and death crises and avoid Emergency Rooms for fear our grown children will be called and risk their finances on our behalf?

WE DO THAT.

I spent all day Thursday seeking affordable health care online. (I know, contradiction in terms.) Everyone should do this to see what it's like for The Hads. You'll find forms that obviously cherry-pick only health people. I got frustrated and actually made a call and was sent to a high-pressure agent for some scam group policy. I researched online while she pressured me on the phone; a less savvy caller would have been duped.

I went back to BCBS, went through all their forms and waited to be told if I was accepted. The only way you can find out is by PAYING UP FRONT. They took my money and left me hanging!! That was over a week ago, I still don't know.

We have to put a lid on that industry!!!

Remember this: One American dies every 12 minutes because they don't have health insurance. This is MSNBC quoting Harvard Medical School, 9/17/09 - look it up.

You Christians out there ... WWJD? How many need to die before you put aside your prejudices?

READ THIS COMMENT BY AN ENGLISHWOMAN WHO LIVES HERE!

I really do feel terribly sorry for those without any means of care. We have been fortunate to have the financial means to overcome any illness or injury. And even more fortunate that if ever we were to have financial difficulties, we can always go back to England for great care. Having said that; I am however against a public option on the basis of my financial investments. A government funded option would compete with my health industry investment profits. And folks, that's the bottom line of this debate! Not socialism or rationing care for the elderly or even hating Obama "the communist" (that's funny) - it's profits! Al Hoffman and the like; including I, don't want our investment earnings to diminish.

I commented on her comment -

"Two words - BLOOD MONEY! How do you sleep at night?!"

Anyway, let's end with a ray of light and a bit of a laugh:

Hooray Alan Grayson, Orlando - http://crooksandliars.com/node/31678

I want to make one last comment about what it feels like to face these people down.
IT FEELS WAY DAMNED GOOD!!!