Happy New Year

Just another night at the Lighthouse Tiki Bar in Fort Myers Beach. I'll leave real names out, but a regular is happy to suck a friend's toes after she complained her boyfriend won't.

She didn't slip off flip flops, she untied Reebocks she'd been wearing all day, so imagine the potential gooiness.

The Boyfriend sat across from them looking relieved that someone else was willing to take on the job.

I now live in a place where the "deep south" is "up north", snow is something we see on the weather channel and my favorite Chinese restaurant has windows.

Last year my New Year's resolution was that I would no longer suffer idiots. That has held true and become a permanent part of my being. If the person doesn't sign my paycheck, I won't take any of their shit.

This year's resolution is that I will watch myself for assumptions, preconceptions and ... oh, just generally be more open.

I thought Florida would be all Jesus freaks and snakes. It's all a matter of watching where you go; and most of the time neither will bother you if you don't bother them. I avoid churches and tall weeds just to be sure.

Prior to the elections, I was making assumptions about who people were voting for. One friend said "don't assume I'm a Republican just because I'm from Virginia." Another majorly hot blonde Baptist guy from Kentucky high fived me when he saw my Obama sticker. ?!?

And then I had to be dragged into the Skunk Ape Research Center in the Everglades and nearly had to be dragged out because I enjoyed it so much. (See previous post.) I was riled when other Michiganders assumed the guys who run the place are skinheads because they shave their heads. (If every guy with a shaved head down here was a skinhead, I guess our state flag would be a swastika.)

I was assuming people would think less of me for driving a piece of shit hooptie ... wherein they actually admire anyone whose vehicle is paid off.

I dunno, I just need to just stop assuming. That's my job this year.

In this New Year I am most grateful for:

Living in paradise, where there are so many new places to discover
Being able to pay my bills
Having a great job with people I love
That all my family up north is happy and healthy
New friends like Connie and Kamla
Iyengar Yoga which is doing wonderful things for my stamina and well-being
Obama making moves that will hopefully usher in a whole new era
That most of the haters have finally shut the F up

I am most annoyed by:

What's happening in Michigan
The Shamwow commercials; although I would do that irritating Oxy-clean guy. Something about the black beard ...
The Hellman's Mayonnaise commercials with the woman who acts like she's choked up by the naturalness of the ingredients ... "say yes to REAL" ...

I had two whole weeks off for the holidays - all the time in the world to go up north and see my family, but not the money and not the stamina. That's the biggest bummer of all.

I thought "what will I do with two whole weeks off??" Now that it's almost over I wonder how I can go back to my regular life with that whole WORK thing.

I have gone to extra yoga classes, walked Fort Myers and Bunche Beaches regularly, seen old friends, met new ones, slept in and taken many naps.

I am rested for the first time in years.